Kids Want You to Look

Anyone who has spent time around children knows that kids want you to look.  The word “look” is a key in the world of kids.  It opens the door to connection, shared experience and knowledge of the emotions deep within.  If you want to spend time in harmony with kids, understanding the power of “look” is essential.

Connection

Saying “look” can be used by both adults and kids as an invitation, a request, a demand or a cry for attention.  It will elicit different responses depending on how it is used.  However, at its core, it is an attempt for connection. It is a way to reach out to each other.  Sometimes our level of energy and the state of our mood will affect how this attempt is initiated and received. Nonetheless, if we can see underneath the presentation and recognize that it comes from a place of need, there is a better chance of a good response. 

1. Kind, loving eyes
2. An enthusiastic tone of voice 
3. Welcoming gestures

Shared Experience

You can use “look” as a theme to create a shared experience with kids.  Doing things that require you to look and explore will not only help your kids learn powers of observation, but also serve as time when you can grow mindfulness and presence as part of your relationship. 

A few “look”-themed activities you can share are:

1. Use a magnifying glass or your eyes to look at soil, insects and flowers
2. Use binoculars or your eyes to look at birds in your backyard
3. Take a walk where you are looking for particular things such as animals, flowers, or certain colours.

Knowledge of Deeper Emotions

Not only do our eyes look at all the non-verbal communication on our kids’ faces, but the look in our children’s eyes can tell us more about what they are feeling than words can. The key to knowing our children’s emotional world is to mindfully look into their eyes and to really see what they are feeling. When we notice that the look in their eyes differs from their words, it is for us to lovingly question and provide space for them to safely release pent-up emotions.

Kids want you to look because they want you to stop what you are doing and be with them, share an experience with them, and know what they are feeling deep inside.

I am a Life Coach for Kids, offering programs, materials, and support that parents can use to help their children discover interests, set goals and intentions, and most importantly have fun in the process. I am passionate about learning, growth mindset, nature, and emotional wellness. 

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